Brake Down - Freak Out! That's Me...

OK So This Is How It Goes....I Talk, You Listen. It Works For Me, It'll Work For You...Hopefully. Well...that's not how i wanted it to go, all I need is a peaceful place ware I can post my mind out on the net...why? Well I've been askin' myself the same thing for quite awhile...all I came up with is that cause I'm not much of a talker, the only way for me to be heard is to type what i say, and i really don't care what i say or who reads it. If you have, good for you...now you know a little bit more about me. If you don't, feck off...I never said I needed you anyways. So lets start with the basics...although i already posted and you might have already pieced something together your self, I'm goin' to shatter that image.

Lets first start of with this page...not what i really want but close enough, I'll go with the flow. On the left the posts and such, on the right the nave, Yahoo! avatar, a MeeBo IM window (talk to me when I'm on) and the Frapper Map (something new I'm trying out). Below that it's all crap! OK that's My Blog Spot...Now I also have a web page, on a free host (what you think I'm made of money?!) check it out some time http://g.iasphost.com/gamegod246 yeah it's a little odd and a piece of shite site but I'm workin on something better as we speak....when I'll be done who knows.

Enough of that shit...now it's my turn:
- I'm currently 18 (19 in June)
- was born June 1988 in Washington dc and moved around for the first few years of my life with my folks.
- i now reside in Chicago, IL been here 16-17 years, it's an OK place but it's boring as shit on a stick! I really want to got out of this hell-hole, too many memories and so-forth...blehg!
- moved around bout 5 times since i got here, but never really left the general area of Lincoln square.
- still in HS but I'm not complaining...some sweet digs i got here at Northside.
- I'm a very techie guy...i could never go a week without online access and a month with out an actual computer.
- I'm Bi...just a fact nothing made it happen or caused it, i wasn't born that way it's just that i have a general liking of everyone; race, creed, color or sex. though i do see why some hate a particular feature, i don't see why they think everyone of that particular feature is exactly the same.
- I'm also single, currently...though I'm not really looking for someone at the moment i do like being around others that i could get into...intellectually and so-on.
- the majority of movies and songs are quite good...though I myself am getting quite tired of the American remakes, formulaic plots and mushy happy endings. as for songs everything is in my favour minus death metal, grunge, most resent country and reggaeton.
- I have a very creative spark...i love to make things, especially for others....happiness of other is nice.
- I've been getting into stage-hand stuff...creating sets, lighting sceams and sound...boarding..? anything that i can put myself into and leave a little piece of me with it.
- on that note, i like to write; poems, stories, songs, characters, etc. well i rarely write them down but i do like thinking them all up. i like how art can be so general and basic yet at the same time mean something bigger then itself.
- I am an open minded person...but even so i can only take so much of somthing before i get tired of hearing it over and over...and when i go and shut you down on somthing don't come sayin' i thought you were an open minded person, hipocit! ...no that's not it, i'm open to things i haven't experienced or don't know much of...but i can still have my own opinion...and if you come trying to chance it...bam!
- i'm not a religious person...at all, don't get me wrong but i'll respect your belifes but just about every religion i know of, and others i don't, are always after the same thing and promis the same thing...yet they always fight...and every time i look into one religion i find out that it's like that one wich is like this one...and so-on. just leave me out of the mess, i'll do my own thing.
- i have a few things that i'm realy into...books, music, IM, and furries...now if you don't know what a furry is you could google it or somthing, if you do..good for you! so my main and most used fursona is William Yamagoshi he's a blood red dragon, sage green hair, cristal blue eyes, bout 7' 3", no horns, has some shape shifting abilities (like changing size, adding and removing wings basic stuff), handy with any kinda weapon and a fire breather (of cource).
- there is one last thing that i will share with y'all... i do have a small case of mpd (multipul personality disorder) they help me deal with the crap i put up with all there years. curently none have taken over or anything like that...but a few of them scare me. i know what they think about and it's not pritty...william is one of the, at first i thought he was kinda like me..but not even close. he's been slowly taking over the others one by one...now i don't know all of them, or how meny there are but i can feel them vanish and more of him every day. it's quite odd...


oh well that's it...well, for now. i really can't think about it much anymore, it's the end of this post...bye bye, so long, fare well...and so-on!

Peace Out I/O

relationship...me? yes, no, maybe so.....on again, off again...back on?

ok so here i am putting my heart out for all...anyone needing a little somthing i'll help to my best, need an ear, anything, anything at all....unless you pissed me off! yeah i like to help others, i could never see myself doin it profesionaly or anything...just a drifting hobby you could say... or would you? anywho...so it was me and basicly me for quite awhile, i had my other personalities to keep me company, and i always had a few friends here and there....but then i get into a relationship...well that was quite awile ago. i'm not geting into details but my first real life relationship started around october...it was a nice gye i met up on myspace. now i know your not supose to do that and such but hay fuck off ok? so yeah me and him went out for a bit, and for some strange reason i didn't try to find out more about him, like i do all my online friends, before i really get into the relationship...and so we drifted, well thats what i thought. yeah so i broke up with him last saturday, oh and right before V-day....yikes! ok now that was bad of me...but hay it get worse...wel in the end anyways, ok so i got into my second relationship...she was a nice girl, it was somthing i never expected, right out of the blue. she came up about half way through november and said 'hay, so you wana go out', i said sure....what a block head. i didn't know she was into me like that...aparently she had a crush on me the year before but never spoke up...she was a freshman...only 16 as of this year. yeah...me, 18...big dif there...well leagaly...yeah know. but i was cool with it, i never thought it would get heavy and deep...oh so wrong. seems that's what she was into....well i just went with it...so cool, i thought...wrong again. we both had our own things before and after school...so no time to spend in the relationship. so yeah we both decided to break that off last wednesday....hay now i feel yeah. right before v-day still...and this was right before school started...her bad, but i was cool with it. so yeah, me in two relationships at the same time on either side of the line...oh you it you haven't figured this out i'm strait up bi. anywho...i was hopin i did the right thing...well i think it was for the best...yeah, i might be better off now...well not cocky like that. ok so me and one of my online friends is starting to get a little deep...he want me to be his boyfriend. i'm not sure if i'm ready for another relationship so soon but this one, he makes me feel nice inside...well still i'm not so sure. i've been trying to get over to him, he's in CA, but so far nothing...welli don't know about you but i'm feeling this blog/rant die down...well that was quite good....and two in one day. a new personal record!!! yeah...woot-woot! haahaa yeah...

new, and all that...the way i like it!

oh so i've been a little out there for...well, i'm not sure. i started this blog to do what most people do on blogs....yah know, post about there lives, and those people in it. yeah, i think i can do that! just one by one....take it day by day, do a little bitching here and there...then i can have the other kinds of posts whare i point out the obviouse, the neat, the cool...all that jazz. oh yeah did i mention the misspellings...every whare, now there might be a spell check at the top of the page but hay that makes it less me. i liked to feal rushed and under the pressure and i don't want to think over what i already wrote as i watch the bot crawl over my work, telling me what's what. no i'm not going to take that kind of abuse!! now here i am i click back a forth through meebo, myspace and blogger as somthing new happens every second i'm online. i wan't to try and stop the madness....but the thought of not knowin what's happening at that vary moent....it kills me. well just a bit...here and there, i liger about the page sklrawling my life on the web for all to see! what, dose that make me better or worse that you can find out everything you need to know with one click and then shove it in my face like some sort of fool. maybe i just don't care anny more...so what if i didn't get that job or got fired from that one if i hated that guy or that company and posted it up here or there.....code flings from left to right a div a src a img a:link and sofourth....fuck off! i controle the code and just let it be know nothing dose what it wants because the admin wants it, remeber i controle the code. it dose what i want it to do, because i skrawle it. now go get and be gone before i ban you from what i call my domain....

(now imangin that i'm yellin my lungs out)